My favorite scene in the movie Stardust consists of this guy getting turned into a mouse. (OK, it’s not my favorite when he gets turned into the mouse, but what happens after.) While he is there in his little mouse cage, this girl starts talking to him. She is convinced that since he is a mouse, he won’t be able to hear/understand what she is saying so she pretty much pours her heart out and says some things she probably would never say to him in person. Well come to find out, he can hear and understand her.
Which brings me to my point. Why are we so afraid of saying certain things to certain people? Why do we think of things we’d say to someone with no intention whatsoever of them ever hearing it?
I’m the first to admit that I’m afraid to do stuff like that. I guess I’m afraid of rejection, of certain consequences that might come, or what people might think. But over the past few weeks, I’ve had two different opportunities to actually say those things I’d never thought I’d say. And you know what? I have felt such peace because of it.
Remember how I had two main things in my life that were driving me crazy? Well ever since I have taken advantage of these opportunities to actually tell certain people in these two situations what I really thought, I have felt such peace. The situations haven’t been “fixed”, but they aren’t driving me crazy anymore. If I would have known that just saying those “things I’d never say” would bring me such peace, I think I would have done it sooner.
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
The things I’ll never say
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3 comments:
Amen.
I am so guilty of this. Maybe not so guilty, because I do say my mind quite often, but I do hold things in out of fear that I will be "found out". I'm as tough as nails, after all. (right) :)
I completely agree, but I think I've gone the opposite way sometime...I say too much! oops!
I think a bit of restraint is necessary sometimes. For example, there are some people who have a fairly good idea that the person they've just met is going to be their eternal companion, but to say so in that moment could be quite detrimental. But I agree that there are too many instances where people hold back their thoughts and words, just because they're afraid for whatever reason.
I think the hard part is that people try to find round-about ways to hint at what they really want to say without actually saying it. Like, "Are you going to that activity?" really means, "I totally want you to go to that activity so I can see you again, and if you seem to reciprocate, I'll probably ask you out." or, "Oh, I'm sorry, I'm busy that night." really means, "I'll be busy any night you ask me out on a date. Lets just be friends and keep at least 2 feet between us at all times."
While I think it is good to say those things you really want to say, there are people that aren't ready for it. It would be nice if everyone was as open and honest as they always want to be in every situation. And I'm glad you've found peace in the situations where you've had the courage to do it! Who knew honesty could be so empowering. :)
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